A Gentle Reminder if You’re Struggling during the Holidays

The Christmas season is not always a time of joy, togetherness and love for everyone. In fact, it can become the most stressful and overwhelming time of year for anyone dealing with

• The loss of a loved one.
• Illness.
• Loneliness.
• Financial struggles.
• Overwork.
• Family conflicts.
• Major life changes.

Trying to navigate these challenges while everyone else seems so excited and optimistic can be an isolating experience. The struggle can lead to an increased risk of substance misuse and a higher rate of depression and anxiety.

It’s important to know that you’re not alone and that you will get through this.

Here are some practical tips to help you.

1. Set realistic expectations.

It’s easy to get caught up in the societal expectations of the perfect holiday season, complete with lavish gifts and meals and picture-perfect celebrations. However, it’s crucial to set realistic expectations for yourself and your family that won’t leave you emotionally, physically and financially depleted. Focus on creating meaningful moments rather than trying to meet unrealistic, material standards.  

2. Focus on what you can do.

Don’t stretch yourself thin working overtime, trying to have an immaculate home, buying the perfect presents and cooking up the most extravagant meal. Yes, “Christmas comes but once a year,” but that does not mean using all your energy and resources. Prioritise specific tasks, simplify decorations, give affordable gifts and make a meal that won’t leave you burnt out.

3. Communicate openly with those you can trust.

If you’re facing challenges, it’s important to have open and honest communication. Tell trusted family members about any limitations or changes to the usual holiday traditions.  Children, especially, are more resilient than we often give them credit for, and being transparent about the situation can help them better understand and adapt.

4. Set boundaries.

Gatherings can be a nightmare for some of us. If you know certain topics or behaviours from others consistently lead to tension, politely redirect the conversation or temporarily disengage. Take a few minutes away by yourself and focus on the positive aspects of the gathering. Moreover, if someone asks you to do something that you don’t want to do or cannot do, say no. You can be polite but firm.

5. Create new traditions.

If the usual holiday traditions are not possible this year, consider creating new ones that better suit your current circumstances. This could be as simple as a family game night, a movie marathon or volunteering to give back to the community. New traditions can help redefine the holiday season in a positive light.

6. Take a break from social media.

Comparing yourself to others on social media can intensify feelings of loneliness and make you feel disconnected from the rest of the world. Consider taking a social media break. Instead, make a conscious decision to spend time on the hobbies you enjoy or have forgotten about. You can even use the time to discover new skills and hobbies.

7. Take care of yourself.

It’s easy to neglect self-care during stressful times. Schedule “you-time,” even if it’s 5-10 minutes. Engage in healthy activities that bring you peace. Allow yourself to cry and grieve if that is what you need. Incorporate healthy food choices to nourish your body and maintain energy levels. Taking care of your mental and physical health will benefit you and help you support your family better.

8. Seek support.

Some of us isolate ourselves when feelings of depression and anxiety increase. Don’t hesitate to lean on your support system during this time. Reach out to trusted friends, family, social media groups or community resources that may be able to offer assistance. Whether you need emotional support, practical assistance or simply a listening ear, asking for help is a sign of strength.

If you or someone you know is struggling, contact Lifeline (24-hour hotline) at 800-5588, 231-2824 or 220-3636.